Back to my old haunts, you know, the places we used to go together...you and me little hamburger...we had a good thing going didn't we? Could we try again?
Yes, yes, yes, it's true. I admit it. I'm back to my old 2-3 happy meal a week habit. Life's just too stressful. I need the drugs. I'm weak.
At least the whole thing, tiny coke and all, is only five hundred calories. I can't explain it, it's just right for me. BUT! Tonight, the horror show I was forced to endure at the McD's!!! OY!
I know you think I'm probably going to complain about the service or something, but no. I was subjected to....THIS!!
WHO THOUGHT THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA??
AHHHH!
Well, what little girl wouldn't want to play with this? And really, the smock is the most delightful element, don't you agree?
The sheer genius doesn't end there. Guess what else this lovely creature does? The dead black eyes open and close!!! Oh yes. You can't even see the molded plastic shower cap on the back of her head. LOL, currently Guy is spinning her head around a la the Exorcist.
But wait, there's more! The name of America's Sweetheart, here?
WENDY.
Lalalala, picture the little girl playing with this gem (suspend disbelief, just pretend). "Mommy, mommy, I love my toy, isn't she cute?" "That's great honey, where did Daddy take you for dinner?" "Hmmm, I can't remember..we had hamburgers!" "Oh, well, what's her name?" "Wendy!!"
(ok, I'm not a marketer. Apparently, neither was the guy behind the choice of this doll and name)
Unless this was a case of brilliant sabotage against Wendy's, because no one wants to be associated with this nightmare.
Then I went to drink my little juice box with a full day's vitamin C, and added calcium! But after the trauma of the doll, this was kinda horrifying as well. Is Ronald high?
As if clowns aren't creepy enough?? Oh, look!
Ronald McDonald is slamdunking the apple, like it is a basketball.
No comment.
And then, the final straw. (fast food humor).....
As you can see, this is slightly more than a third of a child hamburger. (ah...Manna)
WHAT IS UP WITH THIS PICKLE???
Someone exposed this cucumber to radioactive material, I have no doubt. This is NOT a regulation McDonald's pickle.
Well, there's only one thing left to do.
Yep, I'm gonna sue....
I have to admit, I'm laughing so hard as to pee my pants right now. That is the scariest McDonald's toy I've ever seen in my entire life (it looks like one of those evil Puppet Master dolls) and that pickle is seriously freaking me out and blowing my mind. I'm not sure which one will creep into my nightmares, if not both.
ReplyDeleteI definitely smell a law suit...LOL! That doll is horrendous!! This post makes me thankful my kids have passed the happy meal phase.....
ReplyDeleteStuff'll kill ya.
ReplyDeleteOMG!!! to the doll. Email me your address, I'm going to mail you some of my homemade pickles.
ReplyDelete