Because all experiences are valuable.

Friday, July 9, 2010

Where the Boys Are

Last night I watched "A Single Man." Colin Firth was incredible, but on the whole I thought the movie wasn't well realized at all. Isn't the director the same Tom Ford who was a designer? All the acting was excellent, but I thought the script could have been so much more.

Tonight I watched "Extraordinary Measures" with Brendan Fraser and Harrison Ford. Pretty much what I expected. Good for resting one's brain to. Then I watched half of "A Serious Man," the latest Coen Brothers movie. I get the subtle Jewish humor, but I was bored. I'll finish it though to see if it gets better. So now the TV is on and I'm watching "Where the Boys Are." If you haven't seen it...it isn't a happy movie.

Lately the topic of my life has been internet security, in many ways relating to this new blogging venture. Frank says anyone who "goes public" is easily searchable on the internet. He's right. I never used to pop up with much but my college alumni stuff. Now I seem to pop up places I'm not even connected to, like swimming pool companies. Yeah, I'm mystified, too. Frank isn't the only one warning me about internet crazies. I've secured my facebook, but the only way to really be secure on Fb is to not be on Fb. It is a social site, after all.

I think I have a few very negative observations to make here, so apologies in advance. It seems to me that men are almost all the problems in this arena. I know really famous guys get stalkers occasionally, like David Letterman- remember that woman who said she was his wife and got in his apartment? But regular everyday women aren't trolling the internet leering at men, or looking for someone to Googlestalk. Did I just create a new word? If you see that used out there, remember who said it first. I don't even know the latest percentage of all downloadable content that is porn. I'm sure it is outrageous and climbing. OAC. I plan on using that again, too. And who is looking at all this porn? Wow. Possible candidate for most obvious question of the year, and it's only July.

I'm just tired of it. The more things change, the more they stay the same. In 1964, this incredible portrait of Spring Break in Ft. Lauderdale, Fl., that manages to be goofy and whipped cream light, while tackling drunken shenanigans and a horrific date rape, did a pretty fair job of presenting the "boys" of the time. Forward 20 yrs... Graduation trip, 1984, Panama City Beach, Fl, I was kidnapped and held in a hotel room. Forward another 25 years, and I just want to write a blog that means something. I don't have ads to flash at you. I don't have giveaways of products to up my traffic. I don't follow hundreds of blogs and ask them to follow me- rarely reading their content. If I'm following your blog, it is because it interests me. But I have to put my energy into worrying about what kind of weirdo might see my picture and decide to search for me. Instead of into creating the best life I can for my sons and loved ones.

I guess I go around pretty blithely, because I hate to give energy to seeing or expecting the worst. But I can't practice my new "non-resistance" on this topic. I do resist. I object. It isn't fair, it isn't right, and probably all the guys who read my blog currently are "good guys," but you know men who aren't...even your friends. Let me ask you, just quietly, are you doing anything to resist the objectification and denigration of women? Even if that's just not listening or looking at things others say or send you?

That's all. End of small lecture. You don't have to answer. Just think about it for one second. I'd be most grateful.


  1. Googlestalk... I like it.

  2. Women are objects of my desire, but only after I know and love them. As for men, when I'm choosing sides for baseball, I go for the best all-around athlete first, the best hitter second, and the best fielder third. I'm looking for balance. Of course if a woman is best at any of those I'm picking her over any guy.

  3. I like your blog. Not a stalker though I promise.

  4. Thank you, Zombie. I was so very moved by things I read on your blog, and even the power of comments people left. You're as far from stalker as it gets, smile.

  5. Well said...and I love your new word - you should add it to wiki